Friday, December 10, 2010

about me.....

world will be always round no matter what one thinks or feels, That's how I am. always will be like myself, no matter if it is acceptable or not. That's something i want to make clear at very life in my own way, desperate to protect my feelings. Nothing is immortal in this life, and maybe i have the shortest lifespan. so why to bother about other things. when no time to see at least once the whole world. The changes are obvious and same as me. changing with every moment of life. trying to feel every sand of hour glass. and doing millions mistakes. though i dont learn from them. really i don't care about learning anymore.. just want to feel...

love to hide. hide behind mask.hide behind eyes, unknown faces.hope i would be invisible. actually being invisible no fear you have nothing to loose. nothing to worry about. liberty. hiding is not so difficult to. if i am somewhere , their nobody knows me. means am hiding. some place no body cares about me. in some crowd where everyone is
busy with themselves.

like the night. i can watch whole night the stars blinking. like telling some stories of fairytale. like sunset. saying good bye. not what saying hello, like it has given you already. now time to leave. not like coming with some surprises. no expectation.the dark having so many thing to share. it has the sensation. in some late night. with the high beats of music.piercing through my heart. low light. everyone is busy with their movements.and glasses. its dark everywhere. inside and outside. no fake acting. its true faces everywhere.
Though black has a bright side.. to lighten up. if no darkness their, means no needs of light. but more than light. somebody carrying the light through the darkness. showing the path of end. it brings happiness. what i was looking for from the beginning of journey. The finishing line.

its rain. getting wet in it. the drops comes from touch eyelashes, lips, face.and the sound of raindrops. making some rhythm. like ask me to dance with them.rain has a power to change my mood. from happy to sad. from sad to happy.
Music is like drug in my life. I cant live without, It takes me miles away from Present, Makes me feel, cry, happy, cares my emotions.

story is incomplete without her. She showed me the reason to live. But she always wins. I have to surrender before her. She makes me play my favorite game Hide and seek forever, she left me in the darkness, holding the light far apart, invisible, hiding. i lost her always in the crowd. I have to move my feet in the rain, in fear of i will forget the steps she showed me.

I still remember all of her words, her actions, expressions, I recollect them everyday, in fear i will forget them with the flow of time, her smile, her arguments, her liking, dislike, i kept them with great care inside my heart for her, In hope one day the truth will be true for me.